night I yelled at a scientist.  I didn't mean to.  She looked like a plain girl.  Just unordinary.  Mousy brown hair, fair enough face but nothing to write on your blog about.  Small frame.  Nice voice.  She was holding a beer and so was I.  When someone told me she was a scientist i asked, "Oh, what do you science?" and she said, "Blood cancers." and i WHOOPS sort of said, straight-faced, "Well, can you work a little faster and harder because in the past month...and even in the past DAYS...a cancer shitstorm has rained down upon many lives around me."  and then i realized maybe since this lady girl woman scientist (she looked 22 years old tbh) didn't really know me that maybe she would be confused and feel like I'm a weirdo (which I clearly am) so I tempered my small 'outburst' with a smile and said, 'sorry, i mean, i just had a 54 year old relative die in their sleep of bone cancer ONE DAY AGO and a friend of mine's wife WHO JUST HAD A BABY is battling stage 4 stomach cancer and I HATE CANCER SO PLEASE KEEP HELPING THANKS!"  and she said they are having success with whatever :::insert science talk i didn't quite understand::: and it's starting human trials now and it looks really good for :::insert science talk about blood cancer types:::: and I told her thank you.

I guess the moral of the story here is try not to yell at scientists who are doing good things just because you have pent up hurt and anger and pain that has accumulated about unfair things happening to good people who deserve to be untainted with heartaches and threats of death.

this post dedicated to Karen T. (RIP) and my good friend Matthew Salesses and his wife, Cathreen who are on the front lines right now.  Help if you can.


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